Love and marriage - the topic of many jokes and funny stories since time immemorial! But after all is said and done, and laughed about, love is still beautiful! Here are my five favourite marriage jokes!
Mary: "I used to hate weddings; all the elderly ladies would prod me and say, 'You'll be next'."
Jane: "And now?"
Mary: "They stopped when I started saying it to them at funerals."
A man gets up early, dresses quietly, goes into the garage, hooks up to his pickup, and sets off to go fishing, only to find the weather has changed into a torrential downpour with a 50 km/ h wind. He turns on the radio and hears a report predicting more bad weather for the rest of the day. He goes back into the house, quietly undresses, skips back into bed and cuddles up to his wife and, now with a different anticipation, whispers,"the weather out there is terrible".
"I know," his wife replies, "can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that?"
A man approaches a beautiful woman in a shopping mall and says, "I cannot find my wife in this big complex . Can you talk to me for a few minutes?"
"What for?" asks the woman.
"Well, whenever I talk to a beautiful woman my wife appears out of nowhere."
While driving home from a party the wife asks her husband, "Honey, has anyone ever told you how handsome, sexy, and irresistible you are to women?"
The flattered husband laughed and says, "No dear, they haven't"
"Then what the heck gave you that idea at the party?"
At a marriage workshop, the speaker remarks that many couples are so disconnected that 85 per cent of husbands do not know what their wives' favourite flower is. One man turns to his wife and whispers, "It's self-raising, right?"
select one here...