Stages of Grief

Health and Wellness - Life Trials
By: Miri    
09-Feb-2011

Introduction:When death stares us in the face it is always a shock. We build our lives to believe that we will live forever and that death will come later-when we are ready. We all like to believe that we will grow old and die in our sleep just shortly after the passing of our spouse and it will be peaceful. No one ever wants to think about losing a child or dying before that golden age. Sometimes we know its coming. Sometimes it comes when you least expect it. In any case, losing someone you love is never easy for anyone. In the case of terminal illness death may be a relief but there is still a grief that lasts.

  • 01

    Denial and Isolation

    We cannot believe that this is happening. Death seems unreal especially if it is a young person. We isolate ourselves from the rest of the world because they couldn't possibly understand our loss and the way everyone else just goes on about their lives is irritating. Life is not the same.

  • 02

    Anger

    Dear God, How could you take him? He was so young, so full of life. He had a family that loved him and he was a good man. Why would you do that to him? to us? What have we ever done to deserve this? Those Doctors should have known. They should have seen it and prevented his dying!

  • 03

    Bargaining

    I'll do anything to bring her back. I just want to see her and hold her. Take me instead. If I do everything right in my life then you won't take anyone else I love right?

  • 04

    Depression

    I just want to pull the covers up over my head. I don't want to go out with friends. It's all I can do just to go to work. I feel numb. I don't feel anything, not sadness, not joy - nothing.

  • 05

    Acceptance

    OK. I have to go on. He would want that. He wouldn't want me sitting here feeling sad. I want to do something that will show him how much I loved him. I don't want people to forget.


Final Thoughts

The death of someone you love stays with you. You don't "get over it". You do get to decide how it stays with you though. You can choose to focus on the pain of the loss or you can choose to embrace the fact that their Spirit NEVER leaves you. Instead of mourning their absence, accept their presence. Remember their joys and see them there. When you are at the ball game, in a garden in the summer, hiking a mountain, or just having a meal together, remember what gave them joy and celebrate that. Travel to the places that they loved. Do some of the things that you used to enjoy together. Make a plan to do good things in their name. When you accomplish these things it brings them back to you if only for a moment. You can just see them smile.

Supporting Links

Comments

  • clewand550 1/21/2012 Flag This Comment

    Back to give you a H5.

  • goodselfme 1/17/2012 Flag This Comment

    Stopping for a visit and dropping another h5 for you too.

  • workhomeunion 3/10/2011 Flag This Comment

    Nice list Miri, I will say this, once we realize the source from which we all came, and that there really is no such thing as "death" it takes the sting away somewhat, but that does not stop us from missing the physical, earthly presence, of a loved one who has made the transition from this existence to the next ..

  • snowfence 3/2/2011 Flag This Comment

    This is truly a great list of stages of grief. H5

  • clewand550 2/13/2011 Flag This Comment

    I love your list on the stages of grief. Everyone grieves in different ways. I'm sure this will help people who are grieving with the loss of a loved one.

  • Miri 2/9/2011 Flag This Comment

    Thank you for your comment Goodself. It comes from the heart. I hope to help someone else.

  • goodselfme 2/9/2011 Flag This Comment

    I like your list and the personal note of how we deal with grief and death. Well done and with sincerity and gentleness.

Post A Comment

Submit Comment



Need a Top Five List Idea?

select one here...

  • The Top Five Baby Bags for Moms
  • The Top Five Healthiest Fruits
  • The Top Five Funniest Jokes
  • The Top Five Items you Can’t Live Without
  • The Top Five Funniest People
  • The Top Five Free Places for Veterans to Ea ...
  • The Top Five Candle Scents for Winter 
  • The Top Five Movies of All Time
  • The Top Five Foods That Help you Lose Weigh ...
  • The Top Five Websites for Music
  • The Top Five Places to Mountain Bike
  • The Top Five Websites for Artists
  • The Top Five Vacation Spots
  • The Top Five Most Influential Speeches
  • The Top Five Hair Products Women Must Have
  • The Top Five Clothing Lines for Modest Clot ...
  • The Top Five Funniest Websites
  • The Top Five Xbox 360 Kinect Games for Exer ...
  • The Top Five Websites for Discount Vacation ...
  • The Top Five Car Seat Safety Tips
  • The Top Five Tips on How to Make Money Onli ...
  • The Top Five Steps on How to Get a Date
  • The Top Five Diet Pills
  • The Top Five Candle Scents for Summer Time
  • The Top Five Books for the Kindle
  • The Top Five Foods for Diabetics
  • The Top Five iPhone Apps
  • The Top Five Wedding Favors
  • The Top Five Holidays
  • The Top Five Xbox 360 Games
  • The Top Five Ways to Relieve Stress
  • The Top Five Dessert Recipes
  • The Top Five Tips for New Parents
  • The Top Five Healthy Recipes
  • The Top Five Steps on How to Avoid Credit C ...
  • The Top Five Ways to Workout your Upper Bod ...
  • The Top Five Things to See in Dallas Texas
  • The Top Five Places for Discount Furniture ...
  • The Top Five Places to Find Crazy Video Cli ...
  • The Top Five Pasta Recipes for Kids
  • The Top Five Smart Phones of the Year
  • The Top Five Funniest Movies For Kids
  • The Top Five Inventions That Changed the Wo ...
  • The Top Five Online Gaming Sites
  • The Top Five Planets in the Solar System
  • The Top Five Movies With a Twist
  • The Top Five Wedding Gowns
  • The Top Five Ways to Get a Phone Number
  • The Top Five Places to Buy Electronics
  • The Top Five Ways to Cope With Stress
  • The Top Five Helpful Hints to Get Pregnant  ...
  • The Top Five Tips for New Businesses
  • The Top Five Nuts that go in Salad
  • The Top Five Video Games
  • The Top Five Outdoor Activities
  • The Top Five Signs that You are in Love
  • The Top Five Movies of 2010
  • The Top Five Youtube Videos for 2010 
  • The Top Five Gaming Consoles
  • The Top Five Vitamins for Hair Growth
  • The Top Five Websites for Kids
  • The Top Five Places to get French Fries
  • The Top Five Creative Ways to Announce a Pr ...
  • The Top Five Pets you Should Own
  • The Top Five NFL Football Stadiums With A D ...
  • The Top Five Financial Mistakes People Make ...
  • The Top Five Places to get a Free Credit Re ...
  • The Top Five Foods For an Upset Stomach 
  • The Top Five Prom Dresses
  • The Top Five Cartoons for Toddlers
  • The Top Five Presidents of the United State ...
  • The Top Five Health Insurance Companies
  • The Top Five Bedroom Decorating Ideas
  • The Top Five Most Trusted Cars
  • The Top Five Schools for Business Managemen ...
  • The Top Five Most Hated Celebrities
  • The Top Five Books to Read This Year
  • The Top Five Places for Kids Birthday Parti ...
  • The Top Five Most Influential Sports Figure ...
  • The Top Five Ways to Avoid Unemployment
  • The Top Five Bealtes Songs beatles songs Wr ...
  • The Top Five Ways to Stop Smoking
  • The Top Five Healthiest Choices for Breakfa ...
  • The Top Five Mistakes Parents Make With Kid ...
  • The Top Five Candy Bars With Peanut Butter
  • The Top Five Unhealthy Foods for Dogs 
  • The Top Five Websites for Photographers
  • The Top Five Card Games for Four Players
  • The Top Five Commercials
  • The Top Five Designer Handbags
  • The Top Five Professions
  • The Top Five Fast Food Restaurants
  • The Top Five HDTV brands
  • The Top Five Dog Breeds for Kids
  • The Top Five Ways to Keep Unwanted Pests Ou ...
  • The Top Five Rules for a Strong Relationshi ...
  • The Top Five Book Series for Young Adults
  • The Top Five Creative Ways to Ask a Girl to ...
  • The Top Five Ideas for Anniversary Gifts
  • The Top Five Ways to Get a Loan
  • The Top Five Steps on How to Make a Website ...
  • The Top Five Job Opportunities for People W ...
  • The Top Five Causes of Road Rage
  • The Top Five Places to Retire
  • The Top Five Reasons to Invest in Running S ...
  • The Top Five Steps on How to Save Money
  • The Top Five Things to do Before your 60 Ye ...
  • The Top Five Skills Needed for a Career in ...
  • The Top Five Wedding Themes
  • The Top Five Soft Drinks
  • The Top Five Ways to Keep Track of Spending ...
  • The Top Five Knock Knock Jokes
  • The Top Five Educational Websites for Kids
  • The Top Five Things you Should Not do in an ...
  • The Top Five Greatest NBA Players of All Ti ...
  • The Top Five Simple Smart Phones
  • The Top Five Tips for Staying Positive
  • The Top Five Facts About the Sun
  • The Top Five Car Maintenance Checklist
  • The Top Five Business Marketing Tips
  • The Top Five Hair Products
  • The Top Five Computers for College Students ...
  • The Top Five Attractions in the USA
  • The Top Five Reasons you Should Play Fantas ...
  • The Top Five Places to See in the World
  • The Top Five Ways to Improve your Resume
  • The Top Five Healthiest Snacks
  • The Top Five Motivational Speakers
  • The Top Five Ways to Stay in Shape
  • The Top Five States to Live In
  • The Top Five Places to Find Cheap Books
  • The Top Five Cell Phones Under 50 Dollars
  • The Top Five Must See Events in Las Vegas
  • The Top Five Golfing Tips
  • The Top Five Board Games for Groups
  • The Top Five Home Improvement Tips for Sell ...
  • The Top Five Talk Shows on TV
  • The Top Five Walt Disney Movies
  • The Top Five Online Flower Delivery Compani ...
  • The Top Five Reasons to Vote During Electio ...
  • The Top Five Ways to Find Cheap Flights Onl ...
  • The Top Five Traditional Thanksgiving Dishe ...
  • The Top Five Reasons Smoking is Bad
  • The Top Five Days During the Year
  • The Top Five Quotes From the Movie Elf
  • The Top Five Advice for New Moms
  • The Top Five Ways to Turn Down a Job Offer
  • The Top Five Quotes to Live by
  • The Top Five TV Shows of All Time
  • The Top Five Pasta Recipes
  • The Top Five Ways to Save Money
  • The Top Five Songs About Love
  • The Top Five Ways to Get a Grant
  • The Top Five Steps on How to Potty Train Yo ...
  • The Top Five Carpet Cleaning Tips
  • The Top Five Tips for Newlyweds
  • The Top Five Shampoos
  • The Top Five Ways to Build Muscle
  • The Top Five Songs About Texas
  • The Top Five Paint Colors for a Home
  • The Top Five Michael Jackson Songs
  • The Top Five Stresses of Home Ownership
  • The Top Five Luxury Cars
  • The Top Five Ways to Keep your Lawn Green
  • The Top Five Places to Live
  • The Top Five PGA Golfers
  • The Top Five Things I've Learned from Britt ...
  • The Top Five Cities to Live in
  • The Top Five Designer Shoe Brands for Women ...
  • The Top Five Teeth Whitening Tips
  • The Top Five Ways to Invest in Real Estate
  • The Top Five Country Singers of All Time
  • The Top Five Budget Mistakes Most People Ma ...
  • The Top Five Sporting Events
  • The Top Five Healthy Meals For Under 5 Doll ...
  • The Top Five Hair Removal Options
  • The Top Five California Landmarks
  • The Top Five Reason to Rent
  • The Top Five Safest Cities in America
  • The Top Five Ways to Improve your Health
  • The Top Five Career Moves for Teachers
  • The Top Five Google Apps
  • The Top Five 4th of July Party Ideas
  • The Top Five Five Music Genres
  • The Top Five Ways to Prevent Skin Cancer
  • The Top Five Ways to Earn Money as a Colleg ...
  • The Top Five Places to Get a Student Loan
  • The Top Five Photo Editing Websites
  • The Top Five Spyware Removal Systems
  • The Top Five Home Air Purifiers
  • The Top Five Jewelry Stores
  • The Top Five Ways to Earn Money Online
  • The Top Five Steps to Internet Security
  • The Top Five Foods to Avoid when Trying to ...
  • The Top Five Nascar Drivers
  • The Top Five Places to Find a Job
  • The Top Five Reasons For Leaving a Job
  • The Top Five Things to do at Disneyland
  • The Top Five Harry Potter Movies
  • The Top Five Restaurants
  • The Top Five Sources for Vitamin D
  • The Top Five Wedding Websites
  • The Top Five Makeup Tips for Teens
  • The Top Five Tax Mistakes People Commonly M ...
  • The Top Five Tips for Planting a Garden
  • The Top Five Chicken Recipes
  • The Top Five Superheroes
  • The Top Five Auto Insurance Companies
  • The Top Five New York Hotels
  • The Top Five Five Smart Phones
  • The Top Five Tips for Healthy Blood Pressur ...
  • The Top Five Overseas Bed and Breakfast Sto ...
  • The Top Five Items you Never want to Lose
  • The Top Five Ways to Update your Home Witho ...
  • The Top Five Steps to Home Security
  • The Top Five Clues for Crossword Puzzles
  • The Top Five People you Would Want to Meet
  • The Top Five Online Social Networks
  • The Top Five Universities for MBA
  • The Top Five Funniest Movies Ever