Five Zombies That You Do Not Want to Meet

Humor - General
By: Scottf13    
29-Sep-2014

Introduction:There are many types of zombies populating the world today. You can see them in such hard-hitting documentaries as "Night of the Living Dead." and "Zombieland."

Some types of zombies are deadlier that others. Please use this information to prepare yourself, and hopefully avoid meeting any of these undead menaces.

  • 01

    The Titular Zombie

    It should go without saying, but any zombie who has their own name is a zombie you do not want to meet. There are several named zombies, such as "Big Daddy" from the documentary film "Land of the Dead" and "Bud" who is known as a C.H.U.D., despite the fact that he is still technically a zombie.

    The most notable zombie, however, is Jason Voorhees. He is discussed in the film series, "Friday the 13th."

    While some wish to refer to him as a demon instead of a zombie, the fact remains that he is an extremely difficult to defeat corpse.

    Named zombies are especially dangerous because they have become so good at eating brains or chasing promiscuous teenagers through the woods that they have become a household name.

  • 02

    The Smart Zombie

    The concept of a smart zombie seems like it is an oxymoron. How can a brain dead walking corpse be smart?

    Smart zombies don't need to have the intelligence necessary to perform brain surgery. They probably could not even get through the operation without eating the patient.)

    No, smart zombies are especially deadly because they can learn and prove to be quite clever. Sometimes smart zombies will become named zombies. In fact, it is practically a pre-requisite for a named zombie to also be smart.

    Smart zombies can lay traps, and even use simple tools and devices. One notable documentary shared the downfall of a small town due to zombies revived by the dread 'Trioxin' chemical. It is known for creating smart, nigh-unkillable undead.

    In this documentary the zombies lured people to a small mortuary by operating the communications equipment of a police car and ambulance. To this day all emergency dispatch personnel have to undertake a laborious process of verifying that anyone who requests "Send more cops." is in fact not one of the undead.

  • 03

    Tool Wielding Zombies

    Some might think that tool wielding zombies are the same as smart zombies. However, this is not the case. While a smart zombie can, and often does, employ tools, a tool wielding zombie does not have to be particularly intelligent.

    In some cases a tool wielder will only have a tool to wield because they never bothered to drop it after they died and rose again.

    Most of the time this level of zombie threat will only use simple tools like axes or machetes that they find lying around. They can also recognize door knobs and may be able to discern the nature of simple locks and latches.

    The difference between a tool wielding zombie and a smart zombie can be best stated by the manner in which they might use firearms.

    A smart zombie may realize that they can reload a firearm. A simple tool-wielder probably won't even know they are actually holding a gun, even when they fire it.

  • 04

    The Nigh-Unkillable Zombie.

    These types of zombies are often brought into existence by magical forces or a chemical such as the dreaded Trioxin. The latter method has an unstable result if the chemical has sat in storage for a lengthy period of time.

    Newly created trioxin, at full potency, can create an undead abomination that can run like an Olympic sprinter, and cannot truly be killed without the application of extreme electrical currents or burning the entire body to ash.

    Head shots do not work on full-strength trioxin zombies, since every cell in their body is reanimated equally.

    Latter documentaries have shown that after Trioxin has lost its potency the zombies created can be killed with headshots. Although, there is some dispute among the zombie research community. Apparently any documentary in the 'Return of the Living Dead" film series after the third installment is 'pure garbage' and does not show trioxin reanimated zombies at all, despite the apparent usage of the chemical. The evidence is clear for most researchers. Trioxin zombies cannot be killed with head shots.

    In normal zombies the primary reanimating force, usually another chemical or biological agent such as the solanum virus, will be located in the brain only. This is the source of the believe that all zombies will 'die' if they take a severe head wound.

    Do not be fooled!

  • 05

    Animal Zombies

    Animal zombies just plain creep this researcher out.

    The animal zombies follow the same rules as other zombies reanimated in the same manner. A trioxin zombie llama will be just as nigh-unkillable and desirous of brains as a humanoid zombie.

    Zombie animals are not as common, but they present specific challenges. Zombie dogs are especially deadly in the wilds because they are still inclined towards working in packs and they are much faster than a human, even when zombiefied. It should be noted that they are also far more capable of deadly biting, even without the zombification capacity of the bites themselves. (admittedly this is less of a concern since any bite usually results in a zombiefied human anyway.)







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