Traits of a Potential Wife Abuser

Introduction:One might think I should have recognized the traits of a potential wife abuser before I married. After all, I'd already survived child abuse. But, child abusers and domestic abusers have different traits.

If you or someone you know is experiencing confusion or is an abused wife, please share these common traits of potential predators.

  • 01

    Wife Abusers Demand Accountability

    Who did you go to lunch with today? Who was that on the telephone? What took you so long to get home from work? Why didn't you call me today?

    When we're love-starved, we may think these kinds of questions mean our potential mate is simply concerned about our welfare. Be mindful of how charming they can be in the beginning. But be aware of the truth.

    The truth is the predator has already answered these questions in his mind. He is certain you are "running around" on him.

    Demanding total accountability for your time is not love, it's a trait of a potential wife abuser. At this point, you are being emotionally abused.

  • 02

    When Accountability Escalates to Accusation

    If you put on a blouse that is cut lower than usual, he will accuse you of dressing to please another man. When you fail to answer the phone within his allotted number of rings, he'll accuse you of talking to a man on the other line.

    Family visits without him are strictly forbidden. You're just going there to talk about how he treats you and get their sympathy.

    You will have to account for every penny you spend. If the predator doesn't approve, he'll smash or tear up your purchases.

    Unwarranted accusations are verbal abuse and a sure sign that his potential for physical abuse is escalating.

  • 03

    He Tries to Isolate You

    This trait can get very ugly. He doesn't like your family or friends and won't "allow" you to visit them or go anywhere with them. Upon rare occasions when you are permitted to leave home without him, you will be given a deadline time to be home.

    Under his thumb is where the little wife belongs and that's exactly where he will try to keep you. His aim is to destroy your support system and make you totally dependent on him.

    The potential wife abuser is on the verge of feeling justified to hit, slap, shove or choke you at this point, as punishment for disobedience.

  • 04

    It's All "Your" Fault

    If his dinner isn't ready when he walks in the door, it's all your fault. If he doesn't get that promotion, he'll turn everything around to make it all your fault. The classic predator is also master manipulator who believes he can turn water into wine. The list of things he will blame on you could go on ad infinitum.

    He will blame and criticize you for and about every little thing. Sometimes the potential wife abuser will get so angry his neck veins stand out and he gets red-faced.

    When he resorts to physical abuse, ultimately to the point of threatening you with a weapon, it may be too late.

  • 05

    Potential Wife Abusers May Kill You

    If you continue living in this dysfunction, your life is in eminent danger. In the predator's mind, he's got it all figured out. You're cheating on him. He can't trust you. You don't do anything the way he wants it done. It's all your fault.

    The potential wife abuser may force you to have sexual relations against your will. This is rape pure and simple.

    Furthermore, the potential abuser will rationalize his actions. He can do no wrong. In the end, who is wrong and who is right, isn't the issue. You can't be just a little bit dead.




Final Thoughts

Get out. Whatever it takes, make the last sight of a potential wife abuser the one you see in your rear view mirror.

If you're already married, I implore you, if your spouse exhibits the typical traits of a wife abuser, leave him. Leave your clothes, leave your furniture these are just things. You can collect more things; you only have one life. And life is precious.

Escape in the dead of the night if you must, but escape.

I've been there and it's not a pleasant place to be.




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