Signs That You Are In Love

Introduction:When I attended Adult Children of Alcoholics meetings, the mediator explained two important things about real love: you attract people on the same level of wellness that you are and until you are in a conscious relationship it's impossible to work out all of your childhood issues. Based on this, let's examine the signs that you are in love.

  • 01

    Mutual Healing

    Some of us continue to attract relationships based on the negative traits of our parents. We think we can change the other person. When we understand that the only person we can change is ourselves, we start attracting healthier relationships. By observing day-to-day experiences, interactions and character traits of each other, a mutual healing of unresolved childhood issues takes place. Letting go of illusion we can see our partner as they are, not as someone sent to save us.

  • 02

    Mutual Value

    Through clear communication we remove the expectation that our partner intuits our wants and desires. We accept their truth and speak our truth without trying to fit them into our perceived mold of perfection. We no longer react without thinking, but discuss issues calmly and rationally. We understand that each person in the relationship holds mutual value. Our partner's needs are as valuable as our needs.

  • 03

    Negative Traits

    Nobody is without negative traits. A great part of mutual healing is to examine and take responsibility for our negative thought and action. Instead of behavior that is self defeating, we work on ways to overcome our negativity rather than blaming or shaming our partner.

  • 04

    Love Unconditionally

    As part of our Divine Heritage, we were born with the ability to love unconditionally. This ability was conditioned out of us by parents and authority figures. When we assume responsibility for our own actions, learn to live more positively and quit putting unrealistic expectations on our partner, our ability to love unconditionally returns.

  • 05

    Marriage Is Work

    In an unhealthy marriage, we believed that love just happened; that we magically found the right person. In a conscious marriage, we assume the realistic viewpoint that marriage is work. Conscious relationships require commitment, fidelity, trust and most importantly, the courage to grow and change together.




Final Thoughts

Now you know what I learned in Adult Children of Alcoholics meetings about the signs that you are in love. In a nutshell - we work on our issues to the point we attract someone on the same level of wellness. Then, we understand that real love is a process of healing together to the point that both partners love unconditionally. Finally, a loving marriage is work. It doesn't just happen.





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