Ways to Help Others Get Through Divorce

Introduction:Following are five ways that enable you to help others get through divorce. Marriage values that were once held dear have seemingly vanished from our society. Of course, there are valid reasons to seek divorce, such as an abusive partner or an addicted spouse.

Most of us have been divorced, know someone thinking about divorce or recently were divorced. If you find yourself in a situation where someone you cherish comes to you for divorce advice, this list will serve as a handy reference.

  • 01

    Don't Choose Up Sides

    Divorce brings a serious life change to both parties who are divorced. Our natural tendency is to choose a side and then make judgments about the other party. If at all possible, remain neutral. If you were a friend to both spouses, make every effort to retain the status quo.

    Have a heart-to-heart conversation with each person, tell them you support their decision to part, but you aren't qualified as a legal expert. If only one spouse is your friend, be available to lend a listening ear, but again, try not to make judgments. After all, should they get back together, who do you suppose they will blame, if you contribute to their quarrels?

  • 02

    Really Listen

    The best gift you can give to a person in crisis is to really listen when they share. Let them vent. Most of the time, people really don't want the advice they ask for and likely won't take it anyway. Just put all your love and compassion into play and listen.

    Offering to listen anytime they need you is one of the best ways to help others get through divorce.

  • 03

    Extend Your Helping Hand

    A person who is divorcing can use a helping hand for the practical issues, such as finding a new place to live, packing and moving. If you know an honest attorney, offer to introduce your friend. Once they relocate, they may need babysitting help until they are oriented.

    "How may I help you?" is one of the most loving questions you can ask your friend during this troubled time of their life.

  • 04

    Suggest Divorce Recovery Class

    Although we may have learned through the experience of surviving our own divorce, we aren't experts. It's certainly all right to offer counsel where you feel comfortable, but stay inside your limitations.

    Divorce brings with it loneliness, frustration and a plethora of negative emotions. You may want to gently suggest that your friend enroll in a Divorce Recovery Class. Here, they can work on issues in a safe place. Offer to check with local churches and counseling agencies and follow-through for your friend.

  • 05

    Get Your Friend Outside the House

    Following a divorce it's human nature to isolate. As a true and supportive friend, getting your divorced friend outside the house is a positive and loving action.

    Treat the divorcee to high tea at a quaint tearoom. Buy tickets to a sporting event for the divorced man. Consider purchasing a gift certificate at their favorite department store and take them shopping. Something new to wear is guaranteed to lift their sagging spirits.

    Re-introducing your friend to life is one of the loving ways to help others get through divorce.




Final Thoughts

The first few months following a divorce are the most difficult. True friends are our most valuable assets during divorce recovery.




Comments

  • Justinwalker78 7/4/2011 Flag This Comment

    This is all great advice - thank you. I would also recommend a book called Divorce Vows (http://www.divorcevows.com/) to those going through or contemplating a divorce. The book helped me immensely and contains great advice and productive exercises to help you move from a place of rejection and anger to a place of hope and peace.

  • snowfence 5/28/2011 Flag This Comment

    I got another H5 in! lol

  • snowfence 3/15/2011 Flag This Comment

    Thanks for the awesome advice on helping others get through divorce. H5

  • clewand550 3/14/2011 Flag This Comment

    Great advice. Well done list.

  • litetender 3/14/2011 Flag This Comment

    I'm thankful I've never been through a divorce. Have seen some friends go through it, though, and it's so sad. I've heard it's worse than death. H5!

  • goodselfme 3/14/2011 Flag This Comment

    I wish I had you around when I divorced. These are wonderful emotionally stable tips to help in the broken relationships divorce create.

  • JennyHeart 3/14/2011 Flag This Comment

    Super tips on helping someone in the divorce situation.

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