Ways to Stop Being an Enabler

Introduction:Enabling, like any other negative behavior, can be changed. Here are 5 ways to stop being an enabler.

  • 01

    Face It

    Accept that you have enabling tendencies and make a promise to yourself to change. Acknowledging that your efforts, although well-meaning are in fact enabling others is the first step in changing your behaviors.

  • 02

    Set a Plan

    Enablers often jump to "fix" things as a reaction to situations. Stop this behavior by thinking before you fall into your "normal" reactions. It will take a lot to learn how to stop enabling but once it becomes habit you will see your reactions change.

  • 03

    Demand Responsibility

    Those you enable are going to expect your enabling to continue. They will notice when you make efforts to stop your enabling. Respond by demanding that they become responsible for their behavior. Calmly tell them that you will no longer be a part of helping them until they "man up" and take responsibility.

  • 04

    Work on You

    Work on taking care of yourself. You have personal demons of your own that have caused you to become an enabler. Go for counselling in order to face why you have fallen into this pattern of behavior.

  • 05

    See Changes

    It will be tough at first and there may even be times where those you enable will cut you out of their life. This is temporary and do not let it keep you from changing your behavior. In time you will see positive changes in your life and maybe even in those that you enable.


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